at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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