I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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