so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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