even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
