So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
