we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize