i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
It's rum buckets o'clock
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
