so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
