I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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