Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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