Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
