she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
3pm strippers are depressing
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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