And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I am naked and annoyed.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
