these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
