I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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