dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Randomize
