it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
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