Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
You are the jesus of drinking
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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