Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
