Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
