Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
