we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
