After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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