so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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