dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
