Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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