I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
