all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
