Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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