Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Let's paint friendship bongs
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
