Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
