i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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