Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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