This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
