Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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