the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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