More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize