Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
