drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
