he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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