Do vagina's smell?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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