I am in a vortex of obligation.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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