Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
