I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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