If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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