And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
