My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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