I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
