ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Randomize
