the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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