Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
